chris evans reminds me of one of those massive dogs that are supposed to be intimidating but they don’t seem to realize how big they are and just trip all over the place and curl on people’s laps and just wag their tail delightedly as they flop around on clumsy paws
i hate it when my “friends” just dismiss something i’m really passionate about like “oh you’re talking about that again” like shut up don’t ruin this for me do you know how many times i’ve pretended to care or even genuinely tried to get interested in what you like????? the least you could do is fake it rather than making me feel like a burden
This is one of the most hurtful things friends do
So I needed a way to alert the class that I was going to be showing graphic pictures of genitals on my presentation so I decided that putting this on the slide before would work
I want this on a shirt.
Please, I want this on underwear
When a financial institution asks me my “mother’s maiden name” as a security question. Because it’s assumed that I have at least one and no more than one mother in my life AND that she married AND that she gave up her own name AND that that part of her identity was erased enough from my public history so as to be a password to access my private information.
Holy crap, I never realized.
I think the best part of being a woman is the sexual security that we have. I mean like even a straight woman could know that she’s not interested in women, but she can still sit on another girl’s lap and hold her hand and maybe even kiss her if they were that close. If two guys even make eye contact with each other they have to screech “NO HOMO” at the top of their lungs to make sure everybody knows that they are not gay.
whenever somebody says like “so what did you do today?” just look off into the distance and say “the right thing”